When I did the 2007 Hip Hop/R&B Remix Report Card a few weeks ago, it was with the vague idea that I'd be able to continue it as a regular thing instead of just a big year-end wrapup, but I was kind of amazed just how many remixes have dropped since then. If this rate keeps up it should be pretty easy to do this every month. Jon Caramanica did his own thing on the year in remixes for the Idolator 2007 In The Mix package that was pretty good, too (though Noz came with a better counterpoint). My desire here isn't to praise or mourn the state of the all-star remix, just to keep track of them all and sort them out for future reference. Some of these I'm not totally sure if they're official label/original artist-sanctioned remixes, but these are all tracks that have gotten big attention as remixes, at least (also, I can't believe they didn't do a "Roc Boys" remix as a posse cut, should've been so obvious):

"Blow Ya Mind" by Styles P. featuring Jadakiss and Sheek Louch
There's a good chance that 3rd Lox album will never actually surface, so until then I hope they just keep doing a remix together every time one of them has a solo hit.
Best Verse: Jadakiss
Overall Grade: B+

"Can't Help But Wait" by Trey Songz featuring Plies
Nothing to see here, just a generic Plies verse (complete with lots of mentions of "goons") dropped in the middle of this song.
Best Verse: n/a
Overall Grade: C-

"Crying Out For Me (Remix)" by Mario featuring Lil Wayne
This is like Wayne doing his own bizarro take on Andre's cutesy rom-com narratives on the "You" remix and "Int'l Players Anthem," and it's not pretty. Dude needs to sober up, or at least do his recording sessions a little earlier in the night before he's totally zooted. I think the way he says "remix, baby" is enough for me to want him off the remix circuit at this point, in spite of his virtues.
Best Verse: n/a
Overall Grade: D

"Cyclone (Remix)" by Baby Bash featuring T-Pain, Hurricane Chris, and Gorilla Zoe
T-Pain's run of remixes last year was kind of ground zero for his burst of popularity, so you think he'd jump at the chance to do more, especially for songs he appeared on originally, but unfortunately he doesn't kick a verse on this or anything. Baby Bash's whole "weather channel" bit is kinda good, though, and he totally shocks me by outshining two rappers I actually like a little.
Best Verse: Baby Bash
Overall Grade: C+

"Flashing Lights (Remix)" by Kanye West featuring R. Kelly
It's kind of amazing that these guys, two Chicago-based urban radio weirdo geniuses, have never really worked together as far as I can remember. You'd think they would've both ended up on a Jay-Z or Twista track at some point in the past (although Kanye did want R. to sing the hook on "Heart Of The City" originally). And as great as the original is, this is a pretty anti-climactic remix, especially by R.'s standards, although the little harmony thing he comes in with in his 2nd verse is pretty nice.
Best Verse: n/a
Overall Grade: B-

"Girlfriend (Remix)" by Bow Wow & Omarion featuring Cassidy, Soulja Boy Tell 'Em and Swizz Beatz
I kinda slept on the original, but the remix is a total improvement, Swizz taking that bouncy piano riff and adding his trademark clattering chaos to it. Nothing special, but a real solid radio joint, and Bow Wow is still doing his hilariously transparent Weezy-biting new flow. Wierd how the chorus bites "White Tee," though, I can't even tell if that's on purpose or what. Soulja Boy is still, beyond any hyperbole about his popularity relative to his talent, a really lousy vocalist. Usually guys who aren't very good rappers but become hugely popular at rapping can at least do something interesting with their voice, but anytime he's not going "YOUUUU" or "YAHHH" he just has the kind of expressionless monotone that I pretty much never want to hear.
Best Verse: Cassidy
Overall Grade: B+

"Pop Bottles (Remix)" by Birdman featuring Lil Wayne, Fabolous, Jim Jones and Max B.
I was already annoyed that they didn't let Jadakiss do a verse on the original when they sampled him on the hook, it should been a no-brainer to get him on the remix. It's really kind of incredible how Jim Jones is even worse than usual on this, he's trying some weird new voice on here that seems like a terrible idea. Wayne's original verse is replayed, so Fab steals this one easy.
Best Verse: Fabolous
Overall Grade: C

"Sensual Seduction (Remix)" by Snoop Dogg featuring Lil Kim
In her creepy post-prison Jocelyn Wildenstein plastic surgery horror comeback phase, Lil Kim has been kind of going back to her sleazy sex rhyme roots, and it actually works pretty well on the Gucci Mane remix if you forget what she looks like now. And if Kim hit this with a fast doubletime flow like her collabs with Twista, this coulda been good too, but instead Kim just shadows Snoop's melody hook and becomes the 50th rapper to bite the Autotune schtick.
Best Verse: n/a
Overall Grade: F

"Soulja Girl (Collipark Remix)" by Soulja Boy Tell 'Em featuring I-15
I think Collipark is one of the most underrated producers in the South, and I was happy when he finally got out from under the eternal diminishing returns of Ying Yang's career to do something else. But it was also kind of a bummer that the artists he hit with, Soulja Boy and Hurricane Chris, not only weren't very good, but didn't need his beats to have their big hits. So I'm glad he finally did a great beat for one of them, even if it's just a remix, and this reminds me a bit of the awesome Collipark remix of Twista's "Slow Jamz."
Best Verse: n/a
Overall Grade: B+

"Speedin' (Remix)" by Rick Ross featuring Plies, Birdman, Busta Rhymes, Webbie, Gorilla Zoe, Fat Joe, Torch, Gun Play, Flo-Rida, Brisco, Lil Wayne, DJ Khaled, DJ Drama, DJ Bigga Rankin and R. Kelly
The whole Runners/Kelly tag team has worked really well for me so far between "Go Getta" and "All The Above," but this song always kinda fell flat to me beyond just the fact that it's Rick Ross. It doesn't seem particularly popular either, and this big overstuffed remix feels at best unwarranted, and at worst a failed attempt at using a remix to jumpstart a song's hit potential like Khaled's "I'm So Hood." Tom wrote a piece about how this song is the nadir of all all-star remixes, and I'd say he's exaggerating a bit, but I'm also not going to defend it. Most of the rappers on here actually make the beat feel even more inert and weak.
Best Verse: Flo Rida
Overall Grade: C-

This entry was posted on Friday, January 25, 2008 at 12:28 PM. You can skip to the end and leave a response.