The 2012 Remix Report Card, Vol. 6

"Bag of Money (Remix)" by Wale featuring Omarion, Lil Wayme, French Montana, Black Cobain, Rick Ross, T-Pain, Trina, Rockie Fresh and Tyga 
I fucking hate the original version of this song so much, it's really just so many things I find loathsome about rap radio the past few years packed into one piece of shit (plus a Meek Mill verse to make me feel conflicted). And man is it not built for a bloated posse cut remix. Even worse, they actually put effort into it -- Rick Ross switches up the hook slightly ("like a bag of hundreds," just to remind you of how bankrupt a rich man's imagination can be), and they add an annoying synth line to the beat that basically makes me feel like Kanye's unnecessary additions to "I Don't Like" are becoming influential. And then they did an 'extended remix' with three more guests nobody gives a shit about. 8 minutes of this fucking song I have to listen to! I gotta admit that Wale cracked me up with "she hate the word moist," and Yo Gotti being all condescending about "we eat lobster la fleur/ French for 'flower'/ put you on that next level shit." Who the fuck is Black Cobain? Who the fuck is Rockie Fresh?
Best Verse: Omarion
Overall Grade: D

"I Got That Sack (Remix)" by Yo Gotti featuring Young Jeezy and T.I.
I already wrote about how amused I am that Yo Gotti's biggest song of 2012 is not from his 2012 album but from his pre-album mixtape. Nothing special, but Jeezy sounds good on this beat.
Best Verse: Young Jeezy
Overall Grade: B

"Snapbacks & Tattoos (Remix)" by Driicky Graham featuring Roscoe Dash, French Montana and Ca$h Out 
I like this song, kinda feel bad that its buzz has already started to die down, and this remix definitely won't help. They couldn't get any A-listers on this damn track? Driicky is actually good on it, but it's not like anyone here is hard to outshine, although Ca$h Out at least has the right energy for it, although it's a little too on the nose when the "Ca$hin' Out" beat comes in for a couple bars. French Montana is so fucking useless, how did he ever get past the career stage of putting songs on MySpace.
Best Verse: Driicky Graham
Overall Grade: C+

"U Don't Deserve Dat (Remix)" by Trouble featuring Gucci Mane, Rocko and Travis Porter
I hadn't really heard this song at all so I dunno if it's really made enough noise as a single to meet my usual criteria for inclusion here, but OK, good remix lineup, and I do like the song. Gucci's verse is pretty damn funny, didn't think he had something like that in him these days.
Best Verse: Gucci Mane
Overall Grade: B

"Want U Back (Remix)" by Cher Lloyd f/ Snoop Dogg
This song broke America pretty well on its own without a half-assed "California Gurls" Snoop verse, so I'm glad they let it come out here without tacking this on first.
Best Verse: n/a
Overall Grade: D

"Work Hard, Play Hard (Remix)" by Wiz Khalifa featuring Young Jeezy and Lil Wayne
Wiz had been talking up this remix for a couple weeks as having Wayne and Drake on it, so we really dodged a bullet that they swapped out the latter for someone decent. Jeezy sets it off well by actually making the beat sound kinda cold before that cheeseball chorus comes in and reminds you how terrible this song was to begin with, Wayne is more tolerable than usual, and Wiz makes a noble attempt to switch up his flow from the verses on the original, which I always appreciate when the main artist does new bars for a remix, even though the guy's limited ability and blank personality kinda keep it from being actually impressive.
Best Verse: Lil Wayne
Overall Grade: A-
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