The 2009 Remix Report Card, Vol. 3
"All My Life (Remix)" by Jay Rock featuring Lil Wayne, The Game, Gorilla Zoe and Busta Rhymes
It's appropriate that The Game is on this since all I could ever think of when I heard the original was "Hate It Or Love It." I still don't really have any idea who Jay Rock is or why he would have a video with Lil Wayne, but I guess that's the point of a label shelling out money for Lil Wayne verses, to make me wonder that. I wish Gorilla Zoe's verse was longer, his voice sounds great on a track like this, kinda out of his comfort zone in a good way.
Best Verse: Gorilla Zoe
Overall Grade: B-
"Kiss Me Thru The Phone (Remix)" by Soulja Boy Tell 'Em featuring Pitbull and Sammie
I was confused as to why Pitbull of all people would be on the official remix of this, but then he shouted out Mr. Collipark on the intro and I remembered that they have a producer in common. Pretty boring little nothing of a guest verse, though.
Best Verse: n/a
Overall Grade: D
"Make The Trap Say Ay (Remix)" by OJ Da Juiceman featuring Cam'ron and Gucci Mane
Gucci Mane's been kinda growing on me since he's become this weird grassroots mixtape favorite, but his protege/surrogate that's been getting shine while he's been away is pretty indefensible, and this is by far the most annoying song I've heard on the radio in a long time, especially since the single edit inserts even more "AY!" ad-libs to cover up censored words. The beat is so weak and cheap-sounding that I think it's below the standards of most of the local stuff I get sent. I'm not really sure why people seem genuinely excited to have Cam back, since his last album was trash and the new stuff doesn't sound much better, but his verse
Best Verse: n/a
Overall Grade: C-
"Rotate (Remix)" by Capone-N-Noreaga featuring Ron Browz, Swizz Beatz, Busta Rhymes and Jadakiss
This is pretty much the only nu-Ron Browz AutoTune record I really fuck with, mostly because the beat is like some hard late '90s Swizz Beatz shit, so it's nice to hear a remix of it even though it's not really doing anything on the radio. There's apparently another official remix but that features 11 MCs who are less famous than anyone on this and I just don't have the time for that shit (just like there's a 2nd "Arab Money" remix that I just can't muster the energy to listen to). Jada and Capone drop good verses but they're kinda blink-and-you'll-miss-it 8 bar verses, and weirdly as much as I hate Browz's voice he really makes this remix, switches up the hook and does a good varied verse that's like even more new hooks.
Best Verse: Ron Browz
Overall Grade: B
"Turnin' Me On (Remix)" by Keri Hilson featuring T-Pain and Lil Wayne
As much as I've been complaining about the overkill of multiple remixes for one song, I'm glad they went back to and did another for this one once it became an actual hit, because that first one with Busta Rhymes was not worthy of a track this good. As I've said once or twice lately, it's great to hear T-Pain do verses on remixes again, I think that's where he really shines the most besides his solo albums, and I love the little trick Wayne does where he starts his verse like on the original but then it turns out it is a new verse, although it's definitely kinda scattered and not nearly as good as the previous one (and generally Wayne should only rap on a track twice, like "We Takin' Over," if he's ready to kill it the second time). Of course, Keri's verse is getting all the attention for being one of those random diss tracks taking shots at an unnamed target, leading to a bunch of speculation and denials about it being addressed to Ciara or Beyonce or whatever, which is lame, whether it's a publicity stunt or not. But in a weird way, it's nice to hear her do something like that and display some sass and ego, since I kinda feel like her public image so far has been a little lacking in terms of personality.
Best Verse: T-Pain
Overall Grade: B+
"Turn My Swag On (Remix)" by Soulja Boy Tell 'Em featuring Lil Wayne, Jim Jones, Maino and Jadakiss
I've never really had a problem with Soulja Boy on an ideological level, he's a goofy kid and "Donk" was a jam, but I can't really stand most of his music just because he has this really awful, dead-eyed droning voice, and I kinda miss the days when the despised sell-out rappers were at least guys like Nelly who had really pleasant, tuneful voices. "Turn My Swag On" always struck me as one of the worst songs I'd ever heard for the way it emphasizes how monotonous his voice can be, and it seemed like a really weak attempt at a bombastic "What You Know"-style southern rap anthem. So you can imagine how horrified I was when the song, which seemed to come and go without making much of a blip months ago, suddenly got a second life once a bunch of A-list and B-list rappers started jumping on it. One thing I will say that's good about the remix is that Soulja Boy actually raps a decent verse instead of just singing in that horrific voice again.
Best Verse: Soulja Boy Tell 'Em
Overall Grade: C-
It's appropriate that The Game is on this since all I could ever think of when I heard the original was "Hate It Or Love It." I still don't really have any idea who Jay Rock is or why he would have a video with Lil Wayne, but I guess that's the point of a label shelling out money for Lil Wayne verses, to make me wonder that. I wish Gorilla Zoe's verse was longer, his voice sounds great on a track like this, kinda out of his comfort zone in a good way.
Best Verse: Gorilla Zoe
Overall Grade: B-
"Kiss Me Thru The Phone (Remix)" by Soulja Boy Tell 'Em featuring Pitbull and Sammie
I was confused as to why Pitbull of all people would be on the official remix of this, but then he shouted out Mr. Collipark on the intro and I remembered that they have a producer in common. Pretty boring little nothing of a guest verse, though.
Best Verse: n/a
Overall Grade: D
"Make The Trap Say Ay (Remix)" by OJ Da Juiceman featuring Cam'ron and Gucci Mane
Gucci Mane's been kinda growing on me since he's become this weird grassroots mixtape favorite, but his protege/surrogate that's been getting shine while he's been away is pretty indefensible, and this is by far the most annoying song I've heard on the radio in a long time, especially since the single edit inserts even more "AY!" ad-libs to cover up censored words. The beat is so weak and cheap-sounding that I think it's below the standards of most of the local stuff I get sent. I'm not really sure why people seem genuinely excited to have Cam back, since his last album was trash and the new stuff doesn't sound much better, but his verse
Best Verse: n/a
Overall Grade: C-
"Rotate (Remix)" by Capone-N-Noreaga featuring Ron Browz, Swizz Beatz, Busta Rhymes and Jadakiss
This is pretty much the only nu-Ron Browz AutoTune record I really fuck with, mostly because the beat is like some hard late '90s Swizz Beatz shit, so it's nice to hear a remix of it even though it's not really doing anything on the radio. There's apparently another official remix but that features 11 MCs who are less famous than anyone on this and I just don't have the time for that shit (just like there's a 2nd "Arab Money" remix that I just can't muster the energy to listen to). Jada and Capone drop good verses but they're kinda blink-and-you'll-miss-it 8 bar verses, and weirdly as much as I hate Browz's voice he really makes this remix, switches up the hook and does a good varied verse that's like even more new hooks.
Best Verse: Ron Browz
Overall Grade: B
"Turnin' Me On (Remix)" by Keri Hilson featuring T-Pain and Lil Wayne
As much as I've been complaining about the overkill of multiple remixes for one song, I'm glad they went back to and did another for this one once it became an actual hit, because that first one with Busta Rhymes was not worthy of a track this good. As I've said once or twice lately, it's great to hear T-Pain do verses on remixes again, I think that's where he really shines the most besides his solo albums, and I love the little trick Wayne does where he starts his verse like on the original but then it turns out it is a new verse, although it's definitely kinda scattered and not nearly as good as the previous one (and generally Wayne should only rap on a track twice, like "We Takin' Over," if he's ready to kill it the second time). Of course, Keri's verse is getting all the attention for being one of those random diss tracks taking shots at an unnamed target, leading to a bunch of speculation and denials about it being addressed to Ciara or Beyonce or whatever, which is lame, whether it's a publicity stunt or not. But in a weird way, it's nice to hear her do something like that and display some sass and ego, since I kinda feel like her public image so far has been a little lacking in terms of personality.
Best Verse: T-Pain
Overall Grade: B+
"Turn My Swag On (Remix)" by Soulja Boy Tell 'Em featuring Lil Wayne, Jim Jones, Maino and Jadakiss
I've never really had a problem with Soulja Boy on an ideological level, he's a goofy kid and "Donk" was a jam, but I can't really stand most of his music just because he has this really awful, dead-eyed droning voice, and I kinda miss the days when the despised sell-out rappers were at least guys like Nelly who had really pleasant, tuneful voices. "Turn My Swag On" always struck me as one of the worst songs I'd ever heard for the way it emphasizes how monotonous his voice can be, and it seemed like a really weak attempt at a bombastic "What You Know"-style southern rap anthem. So you can imagine how horrified I was when the song, which seemed to come and go without making much of a blip months ago, suddenly got a second life once a bunch of A-list and B-list rappers started jumping on it. One thing I will say that's good about the remix is that Soulja Boy actually raps a decent verse instead of just singing in that horrific voice again.
Best Verse: Soulja Boy Tell 'Em
Overall Grade: C-
This entry was posted
on Sunday, March 15, 2009 at 11:49 PM.
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Anonymous : 4:25 PM